The Beach House
©2022 Susan Noyes Anderson
We came here every year
for years and years.
It was our jam.
We’re gathered here again
at last, but now
you’re on the lam.
I know but don’t know
where you are.
I miss you with my soul,
sorting and summoning bits
of you to conjure up
the whole.
And so I see you on
the sand, beyond
those low, palmed hills.
You toss a football, baseball,
Frisbee – test your
brothers’ skills.
You look my way, lift up
your shades and flash
a smile at me,
then drop them into place
as soft blue eyes
scan sand and sea.
We’d sit on the brick porch
at night and speak
of truth and dreams.
Sometimes the stars were bright;
sometimes their light leaked
at the seams.
But there was beach music,
beach magic, and
you loved it here.
Sea breeze and waves
and sunny days
made sorrows disappear.
This was our place, our family
space. We laughed and
loved and cried.
The earth let go of you,
but we will never
say goodbye.
One day,
we’ll say hello.
Till then, our hearts
hold you inside.
∞§∞
We will never let go of Todd, a truth that is felt even more strongly in these moments of family fun and togetherness at the beach house, where he always seemed to have a smile on his face. Remembering him brings a smile to our faces, too. He is forever ours, and we will carry him with us until the day we no longer need to…the day he is in our midst again.
If this poem resonates with you, you might also enjoy reading “My Heart Is a Google Drive.”
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Tags: bereavement, child loss, death, family, grief, loss, memories, mourning, traditions