Sloppy Joes Are Sick

©1991 Susan Noyes Anderson

Sloppy Joes are really sick.
Maybe they’re cheap.
I guess they’re quick.
But tell me, do you really think
adults would eat these
once a week,
or even touch one
once a week?
They make a mess
from cheek to cheek.

These Sloppy Joes are really rough.
Your fingers turn red
from the slimy stuff.
It runs down your arms
and ends up on your cuff,
then your mom says you’re not
being careful enough.

So come on, kids––
Get on your feet.
Blow all your lids;
refuse to eat!

Let it be known both near and far
that cafeteria workers are
required by human decency
(and if they aren’t, they sure should be)
to give us food that doesn’t drip;
and here’s a helpful little tip…

Neat Joes is what we’re looking for.
Neat Joes, Neat Joes forevermore!

If you enjoyed this poem, you might also enjoy reading Excuse the Mess.

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